Tuesday, April 22, 2014



Pearl Paint has officially CLOSED FOR BUSINESS.
R.I.P. Pearl Paint.




Monday, April 21, 2014

Are you glad? or ... are ...


 , said Jane to the mirror.
   
  "nope." 
               

Dear Abby Jane, please help me find the answers for my deceased excel spreadsheet?

1) Dear Abby Jane, what are spreadsheets used for? Specifically, is there an actual hit list tab button available in Microsoft Excel? I'm not that savvy with Excel ! Especially a bootlegged copy.

-- 'The spreadsheet was a necessity of modern political warfare, an improvement  on what old-school politicians called a 'favor file' it meant that when asks rolled in, she and Bill would have at their fingertips all the information needed to make a quick decision- including extenuating, mitigating, and amplifying factors- so that friends could be rewarded and enemies punished.'


2) Dear Abby Jane, if I am trying to find out if a real jerk that I once knew has died and the obituary section appears to be empty this week, what do I do next ?

-- Just wait. All good things come to those who wait...Patience is a virtue darling. 
*Dear precious readers, I hope that's answered your heartfelt questions. Take care of yourself! 
And Bye



Jane Cum Laude.













The art of acquiring a Free Education.












Graduation Yearbook photo, 2014. 







bye.




Sunday, April 20, 2014

A 'STILL LIFE' HAPPY EASTER display

Created 4 Jane's dear 'PUBLIC'... 

HAPPY EASTER.
bye.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

A chalk walk prophet in 'underwear that's fun to wear?'

    'Change occurs when the pain becomes greater than the fear of change itself.' 
'Fear does not stop death. It stops life.' - chalked the sidewalk prophet.
         
Meet the prophet(snapshot above). He's right up there in his green underwear. So much for conquering fear, Jane. And you thought you had to do this week's laundry. Lord have mercy, on all of us. Happy Easter Jane...at least he's wearing polka dot green. I wonder how many eggs the Easter Bunny is planning on leavin' this guy. bye.

2014 Artists Rights Society (ARS). 
Any unauthorized commercial use of materials is strictly prohibited.  
Copyright © 2014.                           

Friday, April 18, 2014

The World Looks Upside Down - Sour for the Hulluvit.

True, my eye focal lenses do appear to be upside down.
But life does require multi-strategic viewing settings.
"What??"

Basically, when life hands(serves) to you a lemon... 
don 't make lemonade out of it  ...why bother wasting your time with that. 
(Never give any Sourpuss that pleasure). 
Just suck it up (the lemon, that is). 
In the end, it always ends up tasting better that way. 
trust me . 

p.s. Most importantly, you have the great opportunity to spit out all of the pits that way. "Payback's a beeeyotch," said the flying pit.  bye.

p.s.s. Jane, don't drool any citric acid on the lens while you rant your nonsense. And go shave. Seriously. Thanks.






























    
  TRI-X deserts/dunes/terrain location_scouting + tests .. .
    


Thursday, April 17, 2014

And The Death Toll Keeps Rising...

r.i.p. Gabriel Garcia Marquez.
bye :(


2014 Artists Rights Society (ARS). 
Any unauthorized commercial use of materials is strictly prohibited.  
Copyright © 2014.

Artists in NYC, sadly Pearl Paint is closing. 45% off everything (some seventy-five percent off)-- TOMORROW IS LAST DAY. They still have a ton of stuff (remember FIVE FLOORS!).
Or, have an artist you know and love who could use some new supplies? If you can afford it, surprise them with some spending cash and a trip to Canal St. It will change their world for the next months. depressing bye . 
:(

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Cellphone Bronx Pole 'Selfie'



2014 Artists Rights Society (ARS). 
Any unauthorized commercial use of materials is strictly prohibited.  
Copyright © 2014.

 

Exercises in futility... From hopping up and down playing guitar(see me hop in vid clip above at sold-out gig) in the 90's Punk Hardcore scene to running up and down on an automatic multi-functional treadmill that can be programmed to talk to you. Cute? Between these two (inside of this introspective self-exploratory retrospective), I continue to opt for neither one, and will keep on leaning on the 'Road Less Traveled.' bye.


PostScript in lyrical form as advised by Ms. Valerie June Baker. 
Won’t do right, and he can’t be told
No, He can’t be told,
No, He can’t be told
Won’t do right, and he can’t be told
No, He can’t be told,
No, He can’t be told

Spent his whole life running
Trying to meet a mark
Seems like every moment
Put him back at the start
See how he livin'
See where he's bound
Same destination
6 feet in the ground
Eagle bird got his eye on you
got his eye on you
got his eye on you
Eagle bird got his eye on you
everything you do
got his eye on you

Ain’t tryin' to be nobody
But my fine sweet self
Honey, if I give you everything
then, I'll have nothing left
If I've gotta break the law
To be free from your chins
I'll plead self-defense
when that judge calls my name

Rooster crowed in the dead of night
Knew it wasn't right
to crow before daylight.





Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Hampers Syndrome


Pandora's Sox is when an old and worn out historical artifact (like a photograph) is discovered inside of a 'box' that smells like old 'socks.' 

Today the phrase "to open up Pandora's Sox" means to perform an action that may seem small or innocent, but that turns out to have severely detrimental and far-reaching waves of saddness that makes the scent of old rotten socks well worth the time of a long and tiresome day. 

Innocence, and ignorance,  are bliss. And so are laundry baskets. bye.

Magnet Cheerleaders.

                  
              

Monday, April 14, 2014





A Light exists in Spring
Not present on the Year
At any other period —
When March is scarcely here

 A Color stands abroad
 On Solitary Fields
  That Science cannot overtake
  But Human Nature feels.

  It waits upon the Lawn
  It shows the furthest Tree
  Upon the furthest Slope you know
  It almost speaks to you.
  Then as Horizons step
  Or Noons report away
  Without the Formula of sound
  It passes and we stay —
  A quality of loss
  Affecting our Content
  As Trade had suddenly encroached
  Upon a Sacrament.

Friday, April 11, 2014

The Comfort Zone ?



Sometimes a Greyhound may not be the most comfortable dog around, but honestly last time Peter Pan was a much tighter and nastier ride. And that barking complaint has nothing to do with the fact that Petey Boy wore tights in a Disney movie before cashing$$$ in on the bus transportation biz. For all we know, dog owners may be puttin' (Not Putin, but puttin') spandex tights on greyhounds too. But hopefully not on any packed ride.

Moral of this blog if there is one -  Blessed be to the almighty Jet Blue.
Secondary Moral if there is one- Bus trips can be fun despite the lack of bodily comfort. Process over product. Remember Axl Rose getting off of a Greyhound in the, WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE video?

And tights are for fairies, not crowded buses and also not for dogs unless the dog has a body rash like scabies.
And the Amish (peak at the above photo on the right side of photo -on top of the sick dog pic, then go see the below pic too) are forced to wait on a delayed travel line like everybody else.

Like one Amish guy said to another Amish guy, 'When all else fails...just charge up your phone...they die on you ...
...even if you can't let anyone else know that you own one. Everything (everyone) dies on you, at some point.' 'Hey. By the way, where are we headed to this time anyway? Idaho? Cause I heard Idaho got them big assed potatoes. And I'm starved Elliot. Agreed, Janey?' 'Let's just go to a Denny's,' was Jane's rebuttal. 'I wanna order The Lumberjack. The way you guys are talking in circles is confusing the living daylights outta me. And I ain't got nuthin' against lightbulbs actually.  Wanna ride? I called shotgun!'

'Hi Gary,' said the Amish guy to the driver. 


'Sir you must mean, bye,' said Gary, the driver. 'Goodbye sir, get outta my private car. You hippies and hillbilly types really don't know how to tip. I don't care if you want me to drive you to Hardees or not. Get out.  And go catch yourself another greyhound and go somewhere else. There are tons of people on buses so it's impossible to isolate.'
And then that driver drove away. ..

So the next bus drove us (who's us?) off to Toledo, Ohio instead.
And Jane could hear blasting headphones of a passenger, located at the front coach area. And that song was lyrically gut wrenching...


And strangely the Harrison Ford movie 'Witness' played inside of Jane's head for the entire ride. Whatever happened to Kelly McGilless after that Amish film, Jane wondered. I (Jane) heard that she got married in New Jersey or sumthin' like that. Oh well, who cares.

bye Kelly.



2014 Artists Rights Society (ARS). 
Any unauthorized commercial use of materials is strictly prohibited.  
Copyright © 2014.

Problem: jane hates manuals/A.D.D. 101

   SOLUTION:  see jane play.
                              watch jane run.
                              learn by fun (i.e. playing).
   
   REASONING: because that's how you learned how to drive stick shift. You Dummy. 

   GOAL OBJECTIVE:  to learn how to work this without getting a week-long migraine. 
    bye. 

Induction-Moving, Sad and(thankfully)without LAWYERS





CONGRATSTOKURTRIPLINK: https://music.yahoo.com/blogs/music-news/nirvana-steal-the-show-at-rock-and-roll-hall-of-fame-celebration-094506657.html


"We're going to go to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction and I think we're all sitting at the same table." Love added that while it will be awkward, she'll say hello to Grohl, who has had a public war of words with the singer over the rights to, and use of, Nirvana's music for years.
:(
In the interview, Love also discusses her new YouTube channel/reality show, her battles with sobriety and her relationship with 21-year-old daughter Frances Bean. Asked who or what is to blame for their past, public fighting, Love immediately replied, "She has a trust fund. And trust funds attract lawyers. And lawyers attract problems. And that's just the reality."
Jane's spokesperson echoed that final statement. and then 'Bye'd.'


Thursday, April 10, 2014

Kathleen Resigning. Actually upsetting.


Having personally known Kathleen, this resignation is actually personally upsetting. And Jane hopes it is a clear indicator of just how bad things have gotten at the big house.  This is a Bad day.   bye.

p.s. That said, Jane commends her (while Sylvia Burwell celebrates).

p.s. s. Since they're both Greek, we'll call this a Greek tragedy. Chorus included.


Wednesday, April 9, 2014

The notion of permanence, archive and Lenny Bruce.



Why didn’t I think to rewrite ‘Mrs. Dalloway’? I should have thought to chronicle a schizophrenic ballerina. It’s inexcusable. Everyone else is so successful, and I hate them.” But, she adds, “someday the sun is going to die and everything on Earth will freeze. This will happen. I used to think that printing things made them permanent, but that seems so silly now.

         -Marina Keegan  (posthumous blue-blood sightseeing)


Tuesday, April 8, 2014

3 Blind Mice (and one soap box rat)


'Yo' Paulie, like Ozzy said to 'his' audience years ago...Goodbye To Romance. Snitch, crank the ghetto blaster up a notch! I wanna see the conk fly into the potato salad right when the dead guy's guitar solo starts.'  

(Surveillance Still on the Bust Raid)  
Courtesy of Eyeblackout News

TRIVIA: The 'dead guy' is a Randy Rhodes reference. 
        Also, Sharpton used lavalier microphones not Shure 57's.